Here types a very frustrated man pondering this question: What is celebrity really like? With high-profile secret prostitutes and the apparent kinship between those lucky enough to squeeze themselves in front of a television or movie camera, I have to wonder if Hollywood and professional sports aren't quite literally in another dimension, like "Lost." Where else can some waste who brings her boyfriend on a reality show to try and save their relationship end up shacking up -- allegedly -- with one of the world's most famous men?

Yes, Tiger Woods reportedly shared the same high-society "dating partner" as Derek Jeter and Alex Rodriguez. Hey! It's the Boys Club. What a treat for a lady to be wanted by famous people!

Woods also has allegedly -- thanks, US Weekly! -- carried on a three-year relationship with a girl who appeared on "Tool Academy." Wait, does that mean the ruthless manchild she brought on VH-1 to save her relationship was all an act? Oh my! Scandalicious.

All of the sudden swearing after a bad shot seems like a four-year-old earing Play-doh. Whoops.

I wanted to type an article about the supposed death of fidelity, and how much it disgusts me that cheating has slipped down the moral reprehensibility pole, right near road rage and spanking your children (perish the thought). I've heard enough guys over the years drop that, "For every hot girl you see, there's a guy tired of her garbage" to know that I'll just be looked at as a "starry-eyed newlywed" for thinking a vow is something worth attempting to see through. It seems most folks are much more concerned with the fact that Woods could cheat on "such a hot broad" as opposed to the fact that he was cheating at all (Cause we all know if she was a Chubbs McGrubbs, it would be totally understandable).

Instead, I kinda want to use this space to thank Woods for another reminder: he's not Tiger, he's a human being. Maybe worse than that, he's a celebrity, which seems to lend itself more towards the dirtball side of being a dude than the Tim Tebow-side. And there's a huge flaw in my argument right there. Why should I assume that Tebow's example is worth even a sniff? What's worth believing? Isn't his crystal-meth confession and hate of all things holy sure to come? Forget if he can throw a football far enough for your professional liking.

I think the bigger issue here is people like to think there are those who are "larger than life," but Nelson Mandela doesn't do reality shows and Gandhi was assassinated. So we take guys like Woods and try to present them as Jimmy Stewart: classy gentlemen whose quirkly illegal moments involve smuggling a supposed yeti out of India in his wife's luggage. We like to think there's a gulf of difference between Woods and John Daly, but maybe it's all in presentation. It's Hooters versus Nike, 84 Lumber versus Buick. Which corporation is going to be better suited by a public persona, not the man underneath?

I've been around sports long enough to know that what's reported is often just an iota of the real story. Your favorite centerfielder in an 1-for-23 slump? Well, he maybe just got dumped by his wife because he thought the word "road trip" meant "bar room bordello," or maybe he's dropping his shoulder on contact (with the ball, during an at-bat. Sicko.

Maybe the way to take things is to just do what Dan Hager says: just watch the game and ignore whether or not these guys and gals are doing anything other than eating and sleeping off the court/field/box office. Maybe, or perhaps a better lesson is to realize these folks are all the same. Some of them just make a lot more money than us, and forget -- if they ever knew -- that we all live on the same Earth.

Who cares if Mr. Woods talks? Unless this is all proven wrong, he's lost significant standing with me. Like long-admired actors and short-admired running backs with cool nicknames, he's just another talented human being. Another person who simply can't be content with what he's been blessed -- a terrific life with a beautiful young family.

I don't think anyone should have to share their private life as long as they aren't doing anything wrong, but if Woods wants to start his reconciliation with society, as embarrasssing a necessity as that is for our society, he'd do well to come clean. At least come partly clean, and admit frailty. He's no longer the picture of the American Dream, but inasmuch, he can become more a human being. As The Tragically Hip's Gord Downie so eloquently sang in "Now the Struggle Has a Name":

"Now, the apology done
Applause can begin
Now, the apologies done
Applause begins

If it bleeds, it leads
If it cries, it flies
If it feeds, a need
If it dies, it dies...

Now the struggle has a name
We are the same, it hasn't changed
I still feel the same."

In my understanding, the more human we are, the more we connect. The more "above-it-all" we act, as in Mr. Woods' case, the more you just look like a jerk. It all comes clean in the wash, right? Mike Robitaille just asked Howard Simon why we weren't talking about the 30,000 soldiers slated to head to Afghanistan after President Obama's speech last night.

Why would we? Some guy we like might be a jerk to his wife.

Email: nick@wgr550.com