In what is sure to be the most unpopular move in the history of Buffalo Bills football, the team fired Dick Jauron on Tuesday... is a sentence no one will type this afternoon.

The Bills are done with Jauron, and while people will tell you not to have fun with a man losing his job -- especially in "these tough economic times" -- this particular man made millions of dollars coaching football, and he wasn't even very good at it, so develop a sense of humor if it bothers you.

What did he do wrong? Well, first off, he didn't win. His offense was abysmal and when you rifle through coordinators like Jon Gosselin through Ed Hardy tee-shirts, well, in the immortal words of college hockey fans to the opposing goalie after a goal, "It's all your fault! It's all your fault!"

Jauron watched Steve Fairchild and Turk Schonert fail, and Alex Van Pelt struggle mightily, under his watch. Fairchild's Colorado State squad has regressed under his watch (3-7 this year after a bowl appearance a year ago), while Schonert is unemployed. Good picks, Dick!

It's not just coordinators. Three quarterbacks were garbage. Four offensive lines produced little. His team was as injured-plagued as any in the league. That's not necessarily snake-bitten, as Pro Football Talk said. It could be the guys were unready to play football. Maybe he forgot to tell them to stretch. Whoops!

7-9, 7-9, 7-9-, 3-6. See ya.

After he was fired, I tweeted: "I'd go after Bill Cowher, then Bill Cowher and if neither are available: Bill Cowher." I've been told this won't happen because this isn't what Ralph Wilson does. True, but he also usually doesn't fire his coach in season and approve the firing of his offensive coordinator right before the season. Can a tiger change its stripes? No, but it can temporarily lose its bearings and fall into a vat of orange paint? If you provide the vat, and years of losing could've just done that for Wilson. We don't need another "almost" coach, much less a "could be" coach.

As Bills fans, we have to live in a fun world right now. Here's something I guarantee is going to happen: you're going to hear that the players love playing for Perry Fewell and that, to a man, they believe he deserves a shot to be the head coach. Why? Because they are football players and that's what they do. Don't even think of buying it unless the Bills go 7-0 or 6-1 or even 5-2 with the same injury-riddled troops Jauron couldn't rally. In that case, it will truly have been solely DJ's fault.

I have news for you: it isn't actually all him, but the guy had to go. No, it's not his fault Leodis McKelvin fumbled away hope in Week One, and it's not his fault Trent Edwards became gunshy after a promising start. The personnel may not even be his fault, but let's be clear -- the best thing that could happen to this team is a clean house. An actual GM to go with actual powers. You could even call him "general manager" and let the other guy do what he does well. He can still keep his title, too, if he wants.

So feel free to be happy, and embrace the opportunity to speculate. Think about what "Hire Bill Cowher" parody is your favorite idea: Snap!'s "I've Got the Cowher", Huey Lewis & The News' "The Cowher of Love" or Bob Dylan's famous "All Along The Coach Cowher."

Maybe you think Jon Gruden will break his new, multi-year ESPN contract -- It'd be cool, but he won't.

Maybe you think the Bills will give Tony Dungy and Mike Vick a shot -- it's possible.

Maybe you want a guy who looks like ex-President George W. Bush and want to go after Mike Shanahan -- I would've been all for it before a high school kid and a guy with a neckbeard took essentially the same team and started 6-0. Now, I'm just okay with the idea.

Maybe you want Marty Schottenheimer -- If he chokes in the playoffs, at least you're in the playoffs (They happen after the regular season if you're good enough. We should start calling them the "irregular season" here).

Maybe you want Pete Carroll, Mike Holmgren or Bugs Bunny. Let's talk about it. The Buffalo Bills have taken the very-near impossibility of making the playoffs and replaced it with the idea of an actual future. Huzzah!

Pardon my glee, but the Bills officially need a head coach, and I'm pleased. By next year we could be talking about Colt McCoy running an offense under Bill Cowher while Brandon Spikes learns his trade as a middle linebacker in the NFL. Make it a mad libs, I don't care.

Here ya go: 2010 Buffalo Bills general manager __________ selected his new head coach, ________. The new coach said he plans on dedicating his resources to drafting quarterback ____________ and promising defensive stud _____________.

Best of luck to a solid, nice man in Dick Jauron. Now, let's get back to the business of winning -- we checked out for lunch almost a decade ago.

For the amusement of in-game reactions, check my banter at Twitter.com/NicholasMendola

The worst team in maybe the worst division in football. If it were that easy, you'd just turn it off. But the Buffalo Bills aren't the worst team in this miserable football league. They aren't even bottom five. Worst franchise? Now, we're talking.

Your official "if we win out, there's still no guarantee of playoffs" Immediate Reactions...

-- So, here's my dilemma as a post-game typer: If I start with criticism of Trent Edwards, I'm a "hater." If I start with Terrell Owens, I'm taking the easy way out. If i start with the defense, I'm dodging the real issue. If I start with the coaching, I'll stab myself in the arm pit. So...

-- This offensive line isn't helping anyone out and, injuries aside, it's hard to feel for them. Penalty-after-penalty-after-blown-assignment-after-batted-down-pass. Every lineman except Geoff Hangartner got himself a penalty, and the center disengaged early on a play that cost Marshawn Lynch a good 5-10 extra yards. It's a shame the NFL demands five linemen. I'd rather put a quarterback 12 yards deep and throw seven wide-outs out there. Then, James Hardy and Roscoe Parrish wouldn't have to watch.

-- What in the world are the Bills going to do in the offseason? You get Brad Butler back for one of your tackle positions, but barring a miraculous recovery and performance from Jamon Meredith, you need another tackle, a starting quarterback and at least two linebackers. If we don't see anything from Hardy, you need to think receiver at some point, because T.O.'s gone.

-- Okay, I need to throw in another game-related note before we get to Edwards, Owens or Jauron: Rich Gannon is the most useless color analyst in pro football right now. Can we take him and Mark Schlereth, and ship them off to the Island of Misfit Meatballs? It was clear from the get-go that Gannon was going to criticize everything Vince Young did, and hand massage every thing Edwards did. He's one guy who hasn't gotten past -- or at least found a way to conceal -- his clear biases developed during time in the league. I know he knows more football than I've forgotten, but listening to him is like that being the guy in the Bud Light commercial where his redheaded girlfriend uses a nailgun to put his boutonniere on his jacket.

-- I'm listening to Bob Dylan right now to calm my agitated nerves. It's working.

-- Look, Dick Jauron's time in Buffalo is as expired as a 10-year-old bottle of cow's milk, pre-Pasteurization, but I have a hard time criticizing him for allowing Tennessee to try a 51-yard field goal instead of a 3rd-and-23. Chris Johnson looked like Walter Payton had a kid with Barry Sanders on his receptions, and Titans offensive coordinator Mike Heimerdinger had the upper hand on Perry Fewell all day. It's a definite "damned if you do, damned if you don't" decision for Jauron, particularly considering his standing with Bills fans right now. I think I would've let them kick instead of gaining 10 yards and then kicking, but I'm not sure it matters nearly as much as the announcing team wanted you to think. Rod Bironas is an excellent kicker.

-- He reacted like a baby, and was not good for the Bills, but Owens did show that he can still get open, and probably has been for a lot of the season, He definitely should program his gloves to "catch mode" the whole game though. Far too often, he's been flipping the lever for "granite fingers."

-- I know Alex Van Pelt is desperate, and that it's fun to watch offenses pass, but he again bailed on the run game too early. Both Marshawn Lynch and Fred Jackson were getting more than four yards-per-pop, even before Jackson's late 14-yard run moved him to a deceiving 6.0 average. It's sad that this is a coaching staff that acts like it's down 14 during a tie game. It's tough to watch, and I bet it rubs off on the guys.

-- Jairus Byrd is a great, great story in pass coverage, but I'd love to see him not wimp out at the tail end of multiple Chris Johnson runs. Not exactly the "safe" thing for a defense.

-- Even with my kind words for Young, don't forget that Terrence McGee was missing.

-- Another Gannon beauty was saying Young failed to take advantage of the mismatch between safety-turned-linebacker Bryan Scott and a tight end. Rich, I'll take a DB on a TE all day.

-- DFHAJKSDFBASKFN.

-- I just realized I didn't give my views on Edwards. He was fine, maybe even good for what he is -- a great option as your No. 2 quarterback. He made some nice throws, and the touchdown to Evans was a solid throw, one tossed with confidence. That's something we haven't been able to say an awful lot about him. I bet he'd even look slighlty-above average if he wasn't picking his linemen's equipment out of his stomach after most plays. Made a couple real poor decisions that cost his team big, but that's life in 2009 Bills football, I guess. He's your quarterback for the rest of the year, and here's hoping he plays better. If not, would be that big a deal to let Gibran Hamdan play NFL football for the last :57 of a fourth quarter, down 354 points?

Stat line I enjoyed:
Lee Evans, four catches, 50 yards, two touchdowns
-- I enjoyed the two touchdowns. You have to try and find ways to get this guy the ball. He's locked up to a contract, but honestly, if there was ever a guy you'd understand demanding a trade, Evans might be the guy. A lesser man would've gone off by now. Maybe he will.

Stat line I didn't enjoy:
Chris Johnson, 26 carries, 132 yards, two touchdowns; nine receptions, 100 yards
-- There's a scene in the seminal film of our time, "Billy Madison," where Eric plays a violin concerto or something, followed by Billy blowing on a clarinet before awkwardly declaring, "He's good." Yep.

Game ball:
Fred Jackson
-- Why not? Touchdown pass, bunch of kickoff returns, some catches and some runs. Marcus Stroud had himself another day, and Drayton Florence was miserable. Did he maybe take the year's first defensive pass interference call?

Lastly...
"Can You Please Crawl Out Your Window?" by Bob Dylan (and The Band) is a super-solid song, even if there's something quite against the gentleman's code about it. You could say it was a rebellious shot at the more-vocal and violent protestors of his time. I just made that up now, but you could say it. Go Bills.

Next week:
Much of the same, without the early score and minus the late barrage. I say the Jags lead 13-7 for three quarters before late Maurice Jones-Drew scores put the final around 27-17. Then, I'll do another one of these, host post-game and see the E-Street Band, who are reportedly playing "Greetings From Asbury Park" in its entirety as part of their final night on tour, in Buffalo. BRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCE (Springsteen).

I thought Liam Reddox was dead.

Watching the Oilers forward crumple to the ice in a frozen, listless pile of humanity, my mind flashed to two players: Travis Roy and Kevin Everett. In Everett's case, my initial thought at Ralph Wilson Stadium was that I had seen someone die. Luckily, the story became a tale of rising above potential tragedy thanks to smart medical maneuvering, the human will and the power of hope.

If you're unfamiliar or forgot about Roy's case, the Boston University forward went into the boards awkwardly on his first-ever college shift in 1995, and suffered an injury that left him a paraplegic. In 14 years, he's gained use of his right arm, and not much more.

I point both those stories out because neither had a culprit, but both ended in a career-ending injury because the head went into something almost solid with great force, yielding irreparable damage. This has a culprit. When MacArthur put his elbow on the back of an off-balance Reddox to push him into the boards, it wasn't in order to "lay him out," but that doesn't matter. He was the reason Reddox is hurt. That play happens all the time, and the league can use the scary situation to stop it from happening as often.

Being harsh on hits from behind won't take any animosity or toughness out of the game, save for the look of bloody murder a player feels when he gets hit from behind. These aren't the "blind side" hits that have hockey pundits debating the merits and minuses of aggressive hitting; these are mindless, unsafe plays that could easily be curbed. I'm not saying put stop signs above the name on the jersey like so many pee-wee leagues, but a mental stop sign would help.

When I was a terrible hockey player growing up, I know for a fact that myself and other players would turn at the last second to make a hit coming from behind happen. You braced for impact with your stick, because you a knew a "two-and-ten" would happen to the other team. Power play time. Hooray. It's not my proudest moment admitting that, but I bet thousands and thousands of folks who've played ice hockey would admit the same.

So, no, MacArthur wasn't trying to hurt Reddox. Reddox had good position, and MacArthur attemped to get to the puck the best way he knew. Not to mention, MacArthur immediately sprung up when he realized Reddox was hurt, and kept looking back at the fallen player during the entire skate to the dressing room.

I guarantee that play alone will be enough to give MacArthur a little caution the next time he's taking a player to the boards from behind, but it won't serve the rest of the league much. If the NHL tells MacArthur to stay home for a game or two -- and nothing more -- the message will be better sent.

Now, if we can just get Thomas Vanek to see how horrible his dive looked -- you could tell he doesn't do it often. Yeesh -- and Patrick Kaleta to stop grabbing a guy's stick with two hands and doing a reverse wrestling take down that earns Buffalo a power play. Seriously, if I were Edmonton defenseman Tom Gilbert, I would've punched Kaleta right in the face for that move. Pat's really good at his job, but you don't have to love it every time. At some point, it starts to hurt you

(WGR 550) -- Class, before we grade out the first eight weeks of the season, let's do a small mental exercise to warm-up those noggins. Let's check the Buffalo Bills record after the first eight weeks of this wonderful decade we can call the "Zeroes" or the "Oughts."

2009- 3-5
2008- 5-3
2007- 4-4
2006- 3-5
2005- 3-5
2004- 3-5
2003- 4-4
2002- 5-3
2001- 1-7
2000- 4-4

Let's see, let me do some math.. 35 wins... 45 losses... 80 games... carry the niner... that's a winning percentage of .437, which is... Wait, could it be? Yes, yes it is.

The same as a 7-9 season.

Let's go Bills. Let's go Bills. Let's go Bills. B-b-b-b-b-b-Bills.

Actually, the "Oughts" is the perfect name for the decade, isn't it? The Bills "Ought" to have beaten Pittsburgh and made the playoffs. The Bills "Ought" to have retained Pat Williams. Alas, I digress.

First-half report card

Secondary- The Bills' top ten pass defense is a misleading stat due to their inability to stop the run, but the secondary has been the least of the Bills worries. I can't recall too many, if any, pass interference calls, and -- thanks to injuries -- Jairus Byrd has been a revelation. The second-round pick's seven interceptions are rewriting the Bills rookie record book.

The Bills' 15 interceptions are one short of No. 1 in the league, and they've done it with Terrence McGee banged up all year. Drayton Florence has been a good veteran pick-up at corner, which up to this year I thought was against Bills policy (See: James, Will and Webster, Jason). Will be happy to see how this unit functions with Donte Whitner or Bryan Scott back, although it remains to be seen if Scott's work with the linebackers last week is a harbinger of a position change or just a lack of bodies. GRADE: B

Linebackers- No apologies for this moribund unit. Even when healthy, they've been absolutely miserable. Keith Ellison has become a whipping boy for Bills fans, but in a true sign of what ails this team, may be the most consistent player in the corps. To quote Melody Hansen's character in "Dodgeball," "I just threw up in my mouth a little."

Now I'm not saying anyone should've listened to my advice of drafting any of the USC linebackers (Brian Cushing has 78 tackles, Clay Matthews Jr. has three sacks and Rey Maualuga has been a big part of the Bengals resurgence), but I'm saying that the Bills should've listened to my advice of drafting any of the USC linebackers in last April's draft.

Speaking of draft, Chris Draft has been a nice surprise as a stop-gap backer. GRADE: F

Defensive line- I put very little of the unit's struggles on the line, and here's why: The Bills' Top-4 linemen are absolutely dominating the tackle charts in the NFL. While I'll allow that they've faced more opportunities to make tackles than many in the league due to their offense having the drive-sustaining power of a car without wheels, one of the knocks on Buffalo has been their absolute lack of finish from the men up-front.

Marcus Stroud's 28 solo tackles are No. 1 among defensive tackles in the league, while Chris Kelsay's 24 solo stops places him No. 5 among ends. If you use total tackles, both players remain in the Top 5 at their position, while Kyle Williams and Aaron Schobel slide into the discussion. Williams' 30 tackles put him at No. 5 for defensive tackles, while Schobel's 30 stops put him at eighth. Must be the killer beards.

The Bills have 17 sacks on the season, tied for 18th in the league with decent units like Baltimore and Oakland. It's not a great number, but it's just seven behind the garbage pile that was the 2008 squad's entire year. I'm guessing a healthy Schobel matters here. Also resembling a real football team, 13 of those 17 sacks come from the line. They're also the only unit that has stayed healthy. GRADE: B+

OVERALL DEFENSIVE GRADE- C+

Tight ends- This was certainly not how they drew it up. Maybe this team just needs better trainers, or tackles, because Derek Schouman, Derek Fine and Shawn Nelson have all battled the injury or illlness bug... and Schouman lost. Honestly, if Nelson delivers on some truly athletic promise, I hesitate to say the unit would actually be a solid one. GRADE: Incomplete

Running backs- It doesn't appear last, but I skipped typing this grade seven times. Both Fred Jackson and Marshawn Lynch can be No. 1 backs in this league, but neither is utilized enough, and the running plays called are often horrendous. I feel like half are coming off a fake reverse or an ill-advised counter. Why run any delayed-rushing play when your line can't get to the "second level"... more than twice a game? GRADE: C+

Offensive line- So bad that they're replacing guys cut from the Lions with guys off the Packers practice squad. Both of those lines are among the worst in the league, so.... right. I will say this: forget Langston Walker, the loss of Brad Butler is hurting this unit the most. I think Eric Wood will be a solid Bill for a long time. GRADE: F

Wide receivers- If Terrell Owens didn't have several drops, this grade would be much higher, but I think the Bills have a solid receiving corps. I'm not saying they could be "The Greatest Show on Turf" with a good quarterback, but don't tell me Ricky Proehl and Az Hakim would be blips with Trent or Fitz. GRADE: C

Quarterback- The Bills have a second-string, third-string and practice squad quarterback on the team. All they need is a No. 1. While I'm not averse to the idea of Trent Edwards exploding offensively over the next eight games, I find it more likely he actually explodes. I can't get over the fact that the Bills brought in Patrick Ramsey for a work-out, and I found it absurd until I realized that in five more career games than Edwards, Ramsey has 12 more touchdowns and just six more interceptions.

That said, the Bills have won three times, and their quarterbacks weren't absolutely miserable in those games. Can I fail a group that had made a handful of good throws and won three games? Probably.

Again, I hope it works out, but I have a list of 11 draft-eligible quarterbacks I'd be legimately excited about should they end up in red, white and blue. Joe Buscaglia would disagree with me, but I want two: first-round and sixth-round. Sign me a stand-in for second-string and call it a day. GRADE: F

OVERALL OFFENSIVE GRADE- I feel for Alex Van Pelt. This could be his one chance to be an offensive coordinator, and these are the quarterbacks and linemen he gets. GRADE: D

SPECIAL TEAMS- Illegal block in the back, No. __, receiving team. I bump the grade up to a D because Brian Moorman is the best punter and quarterback on the team. Ryan Denney now has two career touchdowns. GRADE: D

COACHING: Not nearly as bad as everyone says... but not good, either. GRADE: D

OVERALL: Somehow, they've won three games. Before the year, I think every one of us would've told you the Buccaneers, and Jets would be awful. The Bills beat them, as well as a Carolina team as mercurial as any in the league. Any other team two games out of their division lead would feel good moving forward. Here? Not-so-much. GRADE: D

Email: nick@wgr550.com

When Cleveland owner Randy Lerner met with two members of the Dawg Pound earlier this week to discuss the miserable experience that is being a Browns fan, my first thought was this:

"What would I say if I was in a room with Ralph Wilson?"

In what is sure to envelope what a sad state of affairs being a lifelong Bills fan is, I think I'd want to ask questions more than anything else. I'd want to listen, I watch this team every Sunday, and when I miss games, I watch them later. It's not the most satisfying mindsey, but pick your moribund record -- 3-5, 2-11, 4-9 -- and I'm still watching.

As pathetic as it may sound, I want to hear from Mr. Wilson's mouth exactly how much he cares about his football team. I have an enormous about of respect for him, and applauded as loud as anyone in Canton when he was inducted in the Pro Football Hall of Fame. I don't need to tell him his team and administration "kinda stink." Anyone can see that, and I'm guessing a man whose made millions has more than the IQ of a third-grader.

But it occurs to me that there are several possible realities surrounding Mr. Wilson's viewpoint on his franchise:

1) The "Triple-Walled Glass Case of Emotion" Approach -- Perhaps Mr. Wilson cares very, very much about the fans and team. The man who goes to a ton of games, even appearing in the bowels of the stadium after the contest. But like many very rich veteran millionaires, maybe he's so shielded from the plight of the city that he doesn't get it. When media members ask him pointed questions, he thinks, "These are the same guys who were telling me to fire Marv Levy or trade Jim Kelly." When he sees the fans protest, he believes his trusted higher-ups who tell him, "They don't understand the injuries, or football, or why we lost today." Maybe he thinks, "They protested when they thought the team would leave in the 1990s, and I worked it out." Yes, there's a chance this man has so many "Yes Men" that reality never gets reinforced.

2) The Apathetic Approach -- Maybe Mr. Wilson is like a teenager playing "Madden." He no longer scans the waiver wire, reads the sponsor emails or checks out the "player morale" meter. He plays the first few games of each season, but if it gets to 2-3 or 1-5, he just "simulates" the rest of the season, occasionally checking box scores and thinking about firing someone. At the end of each season, he sees what the other teams do, signs some guys who other people say might be good, and starts the process over. Maybe he's like me, and "Madden" doesn't hold much interest for him anymore. Maybe he's a soccer fan. In this approach, the question is "What's more important?" and the answer is "Making sure my landscaper properly bronzes the shrubbery in the front yard of his mansion. Going green, my @$$!"

3) The "#$&@" Approach -- Let's say you've owned a business in a conglomeration for years, and did a lot to keep the entire bundle of commerce afloat when other owners were struggling. Over time, new guys bought businesses who understood what you meant to the past, but viewed you as an old curmudgeon, blocking the way of progress. In addition, when folks ignored your warnings about terrible propositions for the conglomeration, you turned out to be right, but the satisfaction wasn't exactly fulfilling because it forecasted doom for the product you've nurtured for years. That stinks.

I just want to know what the man is thinking. I've been a seasont-ticker holder -- twice, actually -- and I'd love to feel like going to the stadium every week is a winning idea, but I don't. Like a lot of folks, I don't have the loot to throw around on seven Sundays when I have 365 days of electricity and such to pump into my house in an area inexplicably crushed by taxes (Can NYC/Long Island be its own state yet?).

Part of me needs to believe in Ralph Wilson as a man. I need to know that the World War II vet who bought his dad's business while looking after the Michigan mine workers he invested in is still living life with gusto. That the passion that motivated him to offer hundreds of thousands of dollars to owners in Oakland and New England is still bubbling around inside him, willing his business to be a success. Truth is, his business is a success, but not his product on-the-field. Lot of rich Internet spammers out there, too.

I'm dozens of years away from knowing if the desire for glory goes away with age. I hope not, but I know Mr. Wilson has a heck of a story to tell, and I'd love to sit down and hear it. Maybe, as is a possibility with Lerner and the Dawg Pounders. it would just be a PR ploy that yielded nothing. But maybe, I could gain a relayable knowledge that this man is still a man with blue-collar roots looking out for the people who haven't had the massive success he's had in life.

Cause I know there are hundreds of thousands of Bills fan who would buy this team if they had the money (or if there was a man willing to sell it).

Let's talk, sir. It'd be a privilege.

There haven't been too many missteps from the boys in blue and gold this early season, but Saturday was one of them. It's super easy to say after a 5-0 loss, but even with three off-days ahead, Patrick Lalime should've spelled Ryan Miller between the pipes.

The way the Sabres played, it wouldn't have made a big deal on the bottom line. The skaters' focus had loss written all over it, but the prospect of Ryan Miller as American Olympic goaltender is looming. Even with the Olympics in the "West Coast road trip" area of Vancouver, it will still likely be an extra handful of games for Miller while the rest of the league's netminders are getting rest.

The Sabres' November is set for one night off per week for Miller, especially with the number of solid teams on the schedule (Philadelphia thrice, Washington, Calgary). They play Wednesday, Friday, Saturday all month. Lindy Ruff could hand-pick the nights off well in advance, and probably has. If I'm the head coach, I play Lalime at least thrice this month (all at home):

Nov. 4 vs. Islanders
Nov. 11 vs. Oilers
Nov. 28 vs. Carolina

You could convince me Nov. 18 vs. Florida, but I know the home fans want to see Miller...

By the way, these are the 12 teams playing Olympic ice hockey. The States' group includes Canada, Norway and Switzerland.

Belarus
Canada
Czech Republic
Finland
Latvia
Norway
Russia
Slovakia
Sweden
Switzerland
United States

Email: nick@wgr550.com

For some more immediate "reactions," check Nick's in-game posts at Twitter. Also, he'll be on the air following Mike Schopp's post-game antics. Six p.m. See you there.

For those like me hoping for some sort of hope-filled reprieve from the ruthless tradition that is November/December Buffalo Bills football of the 21st century, you're forgiven for your naivete. Just think, if your team had any semblance of offensive function, we could be talking unlikely playoff scenarios for two weeks. We could be discussing how you could possibly take out a quarterback who was 3-0 as a Bill. We could be imagining which of the Bills' incredibly-difficult final three contests of the season could be the upset that puts us back in the playoffs.

We could have, but we can't.

-- How many minutes did the Bills offense have the ball? Ten? Twelve? Twenty? This team was all sorts of inefficient, and only scored when the defense put them in a wonderful spot via turnovers. This line is brutal. Both quarterbacks have been ineffective, but for some reason Ryan Fitzpatrick's struggles against Houston stung a little more.

The great Fitzpatrick hope is over, and we can all be sated by the news that Miami, New York and New England all have a better hold on their future at quarterback. If I may note that they went to Michigan, Southern Cal and Michigan. Not Stanford, Harvard, Tulane, Indiana, Middle Tennessee State...

-- Ryan Moats: fantasy stud.

-- The signs were there early. As advantageous as this defense has been, to only get 10 points out of that first half was a sign of impending Sunday doom. Twenty-two fourth-quarter Houston points later... get out of here.

-- Truth hurts, I guess, but please, please, please refrain from the ultra-annoying "we should've lost for the last few weeks just for a better draft pick" talk. It grates on me on the most primal of levels.

-- Bills fans' emotions could be properly summed up by one camera shot going to break late in the fourth quarter, as sterling rookie Jairus Byrd was heading down the tunnel, his day over early. The team's best player out, taking our hope with him. Seven interceptions in four weeks. Now, if he could only learn to tackle.

-- The Bills have lost eight of their last nine home games. It's a horrible embarrassment, but big ups to the fans for cheering Ralph Wilson's reception of his Hall of Fame ring.

-- Marcus Stroud continues to perform well under the radar for a large, large human being. His 35 tackles and 2.5 sacks project to numbers that would've finished second in the NFL last season (70 and five). Entering this week, Stroud lead all NFL defensive tackles in solo take-downs this year. Fight those numbers.

-- Buffalo's linebackers were annihilated at the second level by Houston fullback Vonta Leach. On one play, he sent Paul Posluszny back to Happy Valley.

-- You know what's extra pathetic? If the Bills could play football at all... at all... they'd be one game out, or on top of the AFC East. Buffalo is probably blowing a cherry opportunity to hold sway for a year (or even a week). My goodness, is this team pathetic right now.

-- Is there a more symbolic or telling show of the Bills ills than running "fake Owens reverse" at least four times after it went for the touchdown? My goodness. This offense needs an entirely new coaching staff. The defense probably does, too, but I'm not interesting in harping on that today. They are missing -- what? -- five opening day starters? Six, if you count Aaron Schobel being pulled.

-- I am never interested in what Rich Gannon has to say. He didn't do much in his career -- save four late years with Tim Brown in Oakland -- and he kow-tows to his friends in the league. As much as Fitzpatrick deserves all the criticism in the world, chastising him for Marshawn Lynch dropping a check down pass late in the goings was silly. The guy dropped an almost-sure first down.

-- I did a nice interview with linebacker Chris Draft a couple weeks back, and in lieu of saying something else about the trash performance on the field, check out his "family first" foundation. It's one of the best causes I've seen from athletes doing charity.

-- I kinda wish I could come down with the swine flu again so I could not listen to the raw Whiner Line tomorrow. Aiy-yie-yie.

Stat line I enjoyed:
Lynch, 9 carries, 43 yards
-- Lynch's 4.8 yards-per-carry was the first time he or Jackson carried for more than 4.0 since the Cleveland game, when he went for 4.1. This line can't block for anyone right now, which explains why the more explosive pure talent is the one getting better yards. He may not be as smart, decent or football-witty as Jackson, but he's the Bills' best hope for positive yards in the run game behind this line.

Stat line I didn't enjoy:
Fitzpatrick, 15-of-23, 117 yards, two sacks, two interceptions
-- As it turns out, your completion percentage can be much, much higher when you don't try many throws of consequence. Fitzpatrick struggled on a lot of levels, and when he had the chance to make a big throw -- like he did to Lee Evans last week -- he poorly floats a ball to the corner for Owens. At least he made it easier for his coaches to re-install Trent Edwards after the bye.

Game ball:
Byrd. Two interceptions, five tackles.
-- Kid needs a lot of work in tackling, but he's a rookie and I'm going to enjoy his play for a little while, provided he's not hurt.

Lastly...
What do we even say anymore? I missed my niece and nephew's Christening reception to make sure I saw this entire game via DVR. What a trainwreck. I could've been in South Buffalo eating a lot of food and celebrating something meaningful.

EDIT NOTE: I saw the actual Christening at St. Gabriel's in Elma. Congrats to the Austin and Olivia Milewski, and their parents and Godparents!

Next week:
Bye week.

Email: nick@wgr550.com