For the full roller coaster of in-game thoughts, feel free to visit www.twitter.com/NicholasMendola

That's not on Dick Jauron.

That's not on Trent Edwards.

That's not on Keith Ellison.

That's on Leodis McKelvin, who played with the football smarts of a pinata.

I have no -- let me be clear, zero -- problem with him taking the kick out of the end zone with his team up 24-19. There was 2:06 to go, and he could eliminate the two-minute warning. But to not go down when hit, like you're going to break four consecutive tackles with one hand on the ball? Did Bobby April not relay the "Don't fumble" message? You have got to be kidding me. This team continues to find ways to slice open my soul and pour battery acid into it.

No lie, the Buffalo Bills are the most heartbreaking franchise in the history of professional sports, and those citing the Chicago Cubs, Cleveland Browns and anyone else can go home and eat laundry soap.

I guess we should talk about the rest of the game, somehow...

Why wouldn't you go down, Leodis? Why would you do this to me? Don't you know I was repeating the phrase, "Don't be the Bills" for the last six minutes of the game. All you needed to do was go down.

Anyway, the rest of the game...

--- Keith Ellison can't cover a receiver, tight end, running back or manhole. I feel bad for pointing this out when he made 16 tackles and some decent plays in the run game, but he was abysmal in pass coverage. The Bills need to entertain the thought of a free agent linebacker instead of filling their needs from inside, especially if Paul Posluszny's arm injury in serious.

--- Dick Jauron and the coaching staff didn't do anything remarkably wrong all night, so you might want to sit back and find someone else to blame, and if it's not going to be McKelvin, and it's not going to Ellison... you're probably trying way too hard.

--- Trent Edwards worked as the Bills quarterback Monday night, and topped 200 yards on that frenetic last second pass to Derek Schouman and the rest of the team. He did enough to win the football game, and had a number of balls dropped. He was pressed for time often, and only put one super-foolish, almost-intercepted ball into triple coverage, which hopefully encourages him to throw deep more often. It would be awesome if the offensive line could keep him upright, as some of his more impressive plays were navigating around the Pats pass rush to deliver dump-offs.

--- What a pitiful final offensive drive. You know New England wanted less than 45 seconds left when the Bills get the ball.

--- That said, I didn't see too many plays that weren't called in the preseason, for those thinking the Bills were "keeping all the good plays under wraps."

--- You really have to wonder how they'll ever pull off a win in New England. They got all the calls -- those that weren't against Demetrius Bell, or the bogus but within the rules offensive pass interference call against Terrell Owens.

--- They ruined 4-0 and 5-1 last year. Hey, at least they didn't wait this time around!

--- It was our dog Ernie's first time at the house during a Bills game. He bit my buddy Joshua in the nether regions during a celebration. He'll learn (Ernie, not Joshua).

--- Wide receivers caught five balls. Five.

--- EDIT NOTE: Tim Graham astutely pointed out in his "Rapid Reaction" column -- interesting title, ha -- that the final score was the same as a certain Monday Nighter against Dallas. ghjkSDFaskughDVCBK DSAVCIB SDCJK

--- I'm not going to say I told you so about a healthy Aaron Schobel, but... he's good. Loved the defense on fourth down, and sometimes even on -- Gasp! Don't say it, Nick -- third down. They've got a good look.

--- Good for Shawn Nelson grabbing a touchdown in his first game. One day, he could be as good as that Robert Royal guy (For those unfamiliar with my work, I'm being sarcastic about the Royal part).

--- As long as I've got some negativity stuck in my bones, I'd again like to thank Marshawn Lynch for being an idiot. Could've used some "Beast Mode," especially the way Fred Jackson was almost exploiting the Pats run defense, not to mention the way he collected short passes and turned them into more.

--- It was nice of the game to end at a reasonable hour.

Stat line I enjoyed:
-- Schobel, one tackle, one sack, one interception returned 26 yards for a touchdown
I loved his game, and forgot how smart he played. It's actually amazing that Bills fans seem to hate a hard-working player who doesn't show off and plays fairly intelligent football. The lying-in-wait interception was so well-executed that Brady almost fell for it twice. Tom Brady.

Stat line I didn't enjoy:
-- Bills offensive line, four sacks allowed, countless pressures and several penalties
After last year's game against Oakland, I wrote, "Get better already. You're supposed to be good at the pass blocking part." They need to get better at holding a pocket, though they run blocked well and got into space after the short completions.

Game ball:
-- Jackson, 15 rushes, 57 yards; five receptions, 83 yards, touchdown.
He got the ball a lot, and he didn't waste it. A solid job filling in for Lynch.

Lastly...
Don't do that again. I know you will.

Next week:
Tampa Bay. The Bills should win their home opener comfortably, giving us ample time to discuss how they should be 2-0 and waiting for a showdown with New Orleans. Tampa is better than most would imagine, and this one will be close if the Bills don't attempt to stretch the field. Buffalo 20, Tampa 10.